It's Not Halloween, It's Reformation Day!

Yes, October 31 has been corrupted by the Great Pumpkin and all his ilk when we really should be celebrating Reformation Day. It was on this day in 1517 that Martin Luther nailed the 95 theses to the church door in Wittenberg, an event seen as the start of the Protestant Reformation. But, because The Thinking Servant is kind, caring, compassionate and humble we present to you some ways to incorporate current traditions with the Reformation (well, maybe not so humble).

Theses-or-Treats Hey, give me candy or I'll nail 95 theses to your front door.

Dress Up Like A Reformer Instead of ghosts, goblins, and disgraced celebrities, you can dress up like Martin Luther, Katherine von Bora, John Calvin, Zwingli, and all the rest.

Bobbing for Theology Books Only slightly harder to grab with your mouth though I do not recommend any standard 1000 page systematic text for this. I also only recommend single abridged copies of Luther's or Calvin's works for this.

Reformation House Walk through dark corridors and have rooms like the Diet of Worms room, the Geneva Reformation room, the John Knox rails against Mary Queen of Scots Room, or the Henry VIII gets married yet again room.

It's the Great Luther, Charlie Brown Reinvent the TV special by having Linus wait in a pumpkin patch to get toys from the Great Luther.

Tulip Carving Contests Somewhat less messy than carving pumpkins, but see if you can carve a face into a tulip representing one of Calvin's five points. First prize for the one pre-destined to win.

Wrapping Theologians in Toilet P..... We strongly condemn this activity.

Anyway, have fun on our newly reformed Reformation Day.

Good Names for Rock Groups

After the previous column, I need to have some fun.

These are names I think would be good for rock groups.

Raging Timidity. (I like two words that don't go together)

Oat Bran. (Nasty food. Good rock group name)

Deep Dish. (I think it sounds better than "Deep Dish Pizza")

Dinosaur Droppings. (I would not want to be a member of this band)

Theological Nightmare (made up of Wayne Grudem on bass, Alister McGrath on keyboard, Millard Erickson on vocals, and John R.W. Stott on the drums)

Deleware (if you can have groups called Alabama or Kansas, then why not?)

Microwave Popcorn (this would be a good Disney Channel band)

One Hit Wonders (I like truth in advertising)

Office Politics (It started with four accountants and a dream)

Mildew (A good grunge band)

No Talent Hacks (another good example of truth in advertising)

The Electric Mowinkles (there was this German Old Testament higher critic named Sigmund Mowinkle who, while not being remotely close to the best biblical scholar, definitely had the best name of any biblical scholar)

Pipeline (I've been to Alaska recently so it's still on my mind)

Sermon Prep (Well, I preach so this is also on my mind)

and finally, the last (it may not be the best, but it's the last for now)

Democratic Meltdown (it all started with four Republicans and a dream)

George Utley, R.I.P.

I just read that one of my favorite actors, Tom Poston, has died.

Poston played my favorite character - handyman George Utley - on my all-time favorite sitcom Newhart.

If you've never seen Newhart, check it out if you can. The series is not on DVD yet, but I'm sure it will be eventually.

The saga of Dick Loudon (Bob Newhart) and his wife Joanna (the late Mary Frann) as they buy the Stratford Inn in a tiny town in Vermont was a classic. George was their somewhat clueless handyman. When the show began, they had to put with wacky next door neighbor Kirk Devane (Steven Kampmann) and had a level headed maid Leslie Vanderkellen (Jennifer Holmes). After the first season, Leslie left and was replaced by self-obsessed cousin Stephanie (Julia Duffy). After the second season, Kirk left the show, and local wild men Larry, Darryl, and Darryl (who were already making periodic appearances) bought Kirk's restaurant, the Minuteman Cafe. About the same time Stephanie started dating Michael Harris (Peter Scolari), the superficial producer of Dick's local talk show "Vermont Today".

These were the main characters. I loved the townspeople who dropped by occassionally. Dimwitted Mayor Chester Wannamaker and his equally dimwitted pal Jim, the deathly serious Officer Shifflet, perpetually out-of-work local Harley Estin, and others helped strengthen the comedy.

George was my favorite character because he was a fundamentally decent guy who was very funny.

Some highlights:
* He once bought regular jeans to replace his overalls. He went back to overalls because he didn't like the designer label on the back pocket. He didn't like having to back out of a room.
* When his lodge put out a facebook, George decided he needed a nickname since all the other lodge members had one (and he needed to get it into general use by the following Tuesday).
* He bought a sing along machine and went around singing "That's the Way, U-huh, U-huh, I like it."
* When he casually announced to everyone he had no family to spend Christmas with, Joanna questioned about him being "all alone in the world". George suddenly look serious, and realizing it for the first time, got depressed and said, "I can't believe it, I'm all alone in the world."
* When discussing with Dick about putting in a new furnace, George said it would cost $80. Dick, knowing he's a handyman, said "I thought you'd take care of that." George replied "I don't have $80".

They're probably funnier when you see them acted out. Anyway, our sympathies are extended to Tom Poston's family. And this is one fan who appreciates his work on this show.

Words That Don't Seem to Go Together

Now its time to be controversial in a post. I've been thinking about words that don't go together. Here are some ones you may have heard before.

Working + Vacation

Customer + Service

Sane + Sky Diver

OK, I made the last one up as a joke (Please don't protest sky divers). But honestly there are some words that don't seem together in our society.

Interesting + Lecture. I think the vast majority of college students will agree on this one.

Funny + Sitcom. I don't watch many newer sitcoms anymore as their quality has sharply declined since their glory days from the 60's to the 80's. They mostly are just a steady stream of sex jokes and if you have to resort to sex humor to write jokes, then you need to face the reality that you are not a good comedy writer.

Honest + Journalist. I'm sure a small number of journalists out there are honest but I have learned not to automatically believe anything written or reported by a journalist at face value. They too often slant and distort news brazenly to suit either their political ideology and/or to sensationalize the news they are reporting.

Easy + Diet. I think anyone who has tried to lose weight will agree on this one.

New Years Resolution + That Was Kept. I'm sure all of you that vowed to workout at the gym every day and have already violated that will agree on this one.

Conservative + Democrat. If your actually out there, your not holding political office as a governor, representative, or senator. And if you do get elected, you will slowly drift more to the left the longer you are in office. Some may protest that some conservative Democrats were elected in 2006, but I won't believe it until I see their voting records at the end of the year.

Politically Competent + Republican. While there are some of you who are conservative, you have not shown any competence in the last few years in advancing a conservative, Reaganeque agenda. You seem to mostly be apologizing to the liberals for not being as liberal as they are (and spending government money on pork projects for the district that you have no businesss spending that way).

Honest + Journalist. This just needs to be repeated for emphasis.